People Don't Listen To Understand They Listen To Respond

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Acceptance vs. Love vs. Kindness

Respect, humility, and patience warm a person up. They are more likely to accept you. This is a common denominator throughout the world. It works with animals too. I love wolves and as a child befriended one. I looked out my window and it was love at first sight. He lived with me for nearly a year before leaving. Have you ever befriended a wild animal like that? Some people just have a knack for it. When I really want to be close to them I wait and once I see that they've noticed me, I show no fear but stand off from them. I try not to let the distance between us increase. If it moves away I move closer, if it moves closer I won't move for a while, then I move closer. Animals know when you 'want' to be close to them. They sense it. This behavior works with people too. It makes them curious when you just go about your business and meander near them without acknowledging them. They pick up on it. They see you are curious, but shy. Animals just love that. There is no comparison to having a wild animal as your best friend. But one day he left. It messed me up pretty bad. All I did for the longest time was wonder what I did wrong. That wolf is one of the most treasured memories of my childhood. I have other wild animal experiences I could tell you about, but that'll have to wait for another time. I grew up around wild animals in the woods of Texas. I learned about wild animals from my mother and father who both grew up around there. I don't recommend anybody reading this should go out and start flirting with a wild animal, you could be seriously injured.

It will run off to a safe distance, maybe growl or glare at you? 

Yes, people are the same. Love can be expressed in a number of ways, but in this post we are going to approach it from a different perspective. We're going to look at it from the perspective of acceptance being humble, patient and respectful. We fall in love smiling at each other. We stay in love if we never stop laughing together.  

Acceptance is what we are all after from each other whether our intentions are good or curious. Others can generally since another's motive right away based on experience. We look at intentions by motive. And, during the entire duration of an acquaintance with another person or an animal, we are mindful of motive and disposition. Once we understand their motives we better understand them. But, in order for another to see our motive, we must first gain acceptance. Once we've gained acceptance they will continue to watch for a while until they are sure. Most of us are unbiased and are usually curious about each other's mind and character. Harmless is good, harmful is bad and is determined by how someone makes you feel. People with a sunny character are contagious.

Know first how another would benefit most from being friends with you.

Even if it is just simply that you like them. This applies to all things in life. Let’s take sales for example. When we do not force our way into another person's space like a pushy salesperson might do, that's respect. When we are humble, we pose no threat, that's humility. When we seek their acceptance first, that's patience. We are now close enough to ascertain what that person's needs are. We may then 'share' with them (not sell) what we have to offer them that would fill that particular 'void' in the person’s life. May you want to love them get them to love you. That then becomes love for them. You, I, we, we're meandering for sport, we're there because we want to share space with them, to be near them because we are drawn to them. I was attracted to that wolf. My mind was made up the moment I saw him. It being wild didn't matter. The risk of being attacked didn't matter, I had to find out.

We then become a valuable asset in the life of that person. 

This applies to relationships, work environments, relatives and so on, you get the idea I'm sure. Another example: Is Love. When we love someone we want to see them happy. To love someone is a conscious choice though most people don't realize it at first.

When we love someone romantically we want them to love us back, and to see us both happy together forever. But since love is a choice, once we’ve made that choice, we are taking for granted a lot of things we don't know about that person. But, at that time feel certain we've made the right choice. In the beginning, it's all so perfect. But, nothing's perfect. I cried like a baby when I couldn't find my buddy wolf. My mother said, he'd gone back to the wild and I had to accept that. Still, we work nonstop to please and gain acceptance from another person. We then identify what they are missing or desire in a relationship and give it to them (with the hope of always being there to give it to them forever) because we know that's what we and they want. We want always to be the person they look to for that. The same principle applies to nations and diplomacy, trade and even world peace. Of course, it's a little more complicated in those arenas but the principle is the same. But people change, even though they may tell you they won't! Minds change, feelings change, circumstances change and since we never really get to know a person to the core, we should always be in protective mode, always one step ahead of any potential problem or circumstance, like if they leave you. 

So at the end of the day, when you get right down to it we're just showing them that we've chosen them. We do that in acceptance of other people we see and meet each day of our lives, we show them we don't hate them by showing them friendliness, we show them we've chosen them when we cling or come looking for them when they're not around. We're showing them that we have no ill will towards them. But when we love someone romantically no matter what we do, we will always be vulnerable to the pain that will one day come from them, whether real or imagined. To love is to be vulnerable. If we're kind to them in spite of what they do right, wrong, good, or bad, a good person will love you for it. A not so good person will become the problem you wish you never had. When a person leaves, or your best friend leaves, wolf or person, you will overcome your loss, but they will have to overcome their loss too. And you will love yourself for being a person who overcame the thing that lives in everyone... never being satisfied, but tolerating. That is where all relationships end up. Some people end up doing it together whereas others end up doing it separated from each other. It's all the same. Just people truth. All romantic affairs begin and end that way. Things change, or nothing lasts forever. Something will die as time passes, something will change, but if we can keep laughing together that doesn't matter. And, we plant with fresh seeds the next chapter in our relationship. Work together, never stop giving them a warm smile, don't encroach upon their breathing room, play together, laugh together, hug each other, and keep your wild animal in your life.